Postcards from Pop Music #2

"A Pit With Spikes," Eggs, Teenbeat 96 Exploder

I have probably spent more hours arguing about this song than any other. My love for Eggs’ Teenbeat 96 Exploder and particularly my lifelong obsession with “A Pit With Spikes” has struck many a friend as 'a little weird' at best and at worst 'a perversion.'  I once played Exploder for a woman whom I was desperate to impress, only to have her make me turn it off before the second song had finished.  My fondness for the music of Yoko Ono upset fewer roommates than Eggs. 

I wish I could explain why this is the case. I understand the looks of skepticism when I break out my copy of Yoko’s Plastic Ono Band, but I’ve never figured out why a lo-fi pop band like Eggs raised so many a roomie’s hackles. And so, when I decided I wanted to write about an Eggs’ song for a Postcard, I decided upon the track that was at the center of so many a debate. Consider this piece one last attempt to change the minds of everyone who ever lived with me in college.  Ryan, Bryan, Steve, and Eric: this postcard’s addressed to you. If you still disagree, that’s cool. This time, I probably won’t cover the floor of your room with mulch and plant a garden, but you’d have to admit – it would be an even better prank now that we live hours from each other.*

If you wish, you can listen along on Rhapsody while you read.

As “A Pit With Spikes” begins, singer Andrew Beaujon whimpers. Or maybe he sighs.  Whatever word you choose, the track opens with an ‘Oh Baby’ that’s delivered in such a way as to be almost non-verbal. This sad, pathetic sound is a point of departure: “Spikes” is as much a journey as a song.

The trip gets underway when Beaujon, accompanied only by the keyboard, declares, ‘no one’s asking you stay, oh, baby.’ As the verses go on, more instruments join in: a guitar first, then synthesized strings, and finally a chorus of back-up singers lend their strength to Beaujon’s words and the song builds to one of the most unexpected climaxes in my record collection, if not in all of pop music.  As Beaujon laments the breakdown in communication that’s destroyed his relationship, his voice reaches a crescendo as he sings, 'I feel like a clumsy teenager at times.'

And then all hell breaks loose. 

The sensitive singer-songwriter vanishes and in his place comes a swaggering Travolta.  Beaujon puts on his best Bee-Gees falsetto, the drums kick in, and the song briefly turns into a musical homage to the age of Studio 54.  When the dance fever has passed, Beaujon sounds reborn, singing with a confidence that he lacked before he discoed.

Honestly, I don’t know if his baby stays, or if surviving a bout of Saturday Night Fever gave Beaujon the strength to let her go. Hell, I have my doubts whether he wanted her to leave in the first place.  In the end, the song isn't really about his baby, but the transformation of Beaujon's character – musically, at least – from quiet insecurity to such flashy confidence.

Maybe he’s onto something in “A Pit With Spikes.”  Maybe when you can’t find the words, you should turn to disco. So I ask my former roommates: would you like Eggs, if I did the hustle?